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Thanks to Kanye’s workout plan / I’m the envy of all my friends / See I pulled me a baller man / And I ain’t gotta work at the mall again…
When Kanye West was my special little secret before everyone started creaming over him, he was cool as shit. But now ya’ll done gone and messed up the enjoyment of him for me.
Ya’ll did this with The Neptunes. I remember when I was back in high school with my SWV and Total CDs, talking about how hot these Neptunes cats were, but ya’ll didn’t want to hear it. Then ya’ll sweat the guys a few years later, and wear them out so bad that you now have the nerve to criticize them. You know who you are, the hip-hop public that boosts these guys egos and as soon as they start to believe your drivel, you tear them down. We can only blame the egos of Pharrell Williams and Kanye West on you. But before I send you to your corner, there’s a little something I want to bust up in your earhole, shawty.

I think the first joint by Kanye that really hinted towards the sound he’s known for was Beanie Sigel’s “The Truth”. The track was muscular and had just enough attitude and atmosphere to compliment Beanie Mack’s aggressive, heavy-handed delivery. It was also the first time I’d ever seen his name appear in a credit without Deric “D-Dot” Angelettie’s “Crazy Cat”. For those of you that know the history, Kanye apprenticed under D-Dot, one of Bad Boy’s Hitmen, and there’s a legend that he’s the one behind the track for “The Benjamins”.
The beat for “This Can’t Be Life” from Jay-Z’s Dynasty album was only a taste of what would be become Kanye’s signature track, “Izzo”. What followed was a stream of head-nodders and club-bangers: “’03 Bonnie & Clyde”, Trina’s “B R Right”, Kweli’s “Get By” (still my favorite hip-hop joint of the moment), all three incarnations of “Brown Sugar” from that film’s soundtrack, Ludacris, Monica, Alicia… You get the idea. I had to give him his props. It’s not everyday you get Jay, Kweli, Busta and Snoop on the same track and not have it sound like a total disaster. *dap* His approach to beatmaking crossed the boundaries of commercial and “backpack” rap, a rare occurence.
After refining his knack for splicing the perfect old school samples to elicit nostalgia, he dropped “Through the Wire” and “Slow Jams”, both of which showcased his mediocre skills on the mic. (We’re not even gonna get into his abysmal “Milkshake” freestyle that Jay Smoove graced us with… ahem.) And lo and behold, all of a sudden people cared who he was, and within a matter of weeks people began to hate him. It’s inevitable. If you tell a man enough times that he’s able to walk on water, he’ll start to believe you.
But does he drown on College Dropout, his freshman debut? Well, his promise to save the best beats for himself was a damn lie, as I’ve heard better from him. His flow and lyrics? Odd enough, you can do a lot worse. Let’s be real, we give him a lot of shit, but I’d take him over Loon and F-A-G-O-L-O-U-S any day. A standout for me is “Jesus Walks”, which boasts the same kind of dark, aggressive production as the aforementioned “Truth” and Jay-Z’s controversial “Takeover”. The lyrics? There’s a message of hope in there somewhere, by why quote that when I can provide you with the breakdown from “A New Workout Plan”?
That’s right put in work / Move your ass, go bizzerk / Eat your salad, no dessert / Get that man you deserve…
What a gay-ass song! I think this song is a cry for help, because this is by far one of the gayest hip-hop songs I’ve ever heard, right up there with Lil’ Kim’s “Bad Girl” featuring RuPaul. What brought up the G.Q. (gay quotient), you ask? For starters, I’d be here all day if I was to count the number of times Kanye says “work”. Then there’s the soulclap. Then there’s the pseudo house beat. Then there’s Kanye’s gay-ass rapping that makes him sound like he’s officiating a voguing competition. It’s my favorite track on the whole damn CD. Bitch work!!!
The dreaded ego rears it’s ugly head at the end of “Last Call”, where he’s kind enough to bless us with 9 minutes of yapping about how he got into the game. *zzzZZZzzz* What he should’ve learned is that most of the people sweating him now actually don’t give a shit, because the pop audience probably doesn’t know who or what the hell he’s talking about. Hopefully, however, this CD will serve as a tool to bring together two different audiences. He has forged professional relationships with Jay, Ludacris, Common and Talib Kweli, who all appear on the CD along with a host of others that represent a wide spectrum of the players in hip-hop.
It ain’t a bad CD, per se, but it ain’t the shizzle either. Borrow EJ’s and make your own assessment.